On a warm Monday evening (but not crazy hot like some recent evenings), 7 happy GGers gathered at the grounds of the Landmark Centre in Teddington. If you've not been, it's really quite a sight - a huge cathedral-style church with flying buttresses (I credit reading "The Pillars of the Earth" by Ken Follett for educating me on those), which is no longer used for the observance of religion but as the home of an independent charity whose purpose is to maintain the building as an energetic arts centre and community resource.

Here's the history from the website: "Our magnificent building was constructed in the 1880s as the church of St Alban The Martyr. Originally designed for a congregation of 1200, by the 1970s it was declared redundant and was neglected for many years. A passionate campaign led by local people eventually succeeded in saving it from demolition and in 1995 it became the home of a new community art centre – the Landmark Arts Centre."

We arrived to find volunteer Andy who gave us a list of options to work on. We asked what was the most important/urgent help needed and were told of a strange thing called "ALKANET".

WARNING: rest of report is a bit weird.

We meekly accepted this and followed Andy, expecting further instructions. It turns out that rather than being some kind of Terminator II-style organisation of the future, Alkanet (specifically Green Alkanet) is a voracious intruder, linked through an underground network, which is seeking to take over the world. Oh, so a bit like a Terminator II-style organisation of the future.

Andy demonstrated how to tackle our foe (no explosives required, just a good spade and a pair of gardening gloves) and we spread out to better stem the tide of green chaos. Emulating Sarah Connor, Kate fought the good fight against the invaders while carrying the next generation to ensure a brighter future. The rest of us, her footsoldiers, backed her up across different territories, doing our best to keep the menace at bay.

Eventually we had to concede temporary defeat. ALKANET will survive another day. But we will regroup. We will recruit new volunteers to the cause. We will be back to fight. And we will conquer.

#ALKANETWILLFALL #NOFATE