Saw Again? (a GoodGym Mockumentary)

7 Goodgymers helped their local community in Greenwich
Kit
Sarah M
Rachel Henry
Julian Osman
Tom Bigglestone
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Greenwich

Wednesday 1st November 2023

Credits
Rachel Henry
Rachel Henry

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Report written by Rachel Henry

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NB: This report features a description of two short films which doesn't do them justice. If you'd like to watch the films you can refer to the GGG whatsapp group but I will warn you: they are harrowing.

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It started like any ordinary Wednesday evening, meeting this week in Woolwich and swapping stories about how genuinely boring our Halloween's were. Sarah definitely won, having put the effort into carving a pumpkin and handing out sweets to the trick or treaters. Is that worthy of a good deed, GoodGym? I think after the night Sarah had, it should be (see short film 1 "Psycho" for full context).

After a short run up to Glyndon we were joined by Pieter and Kit and set to work on our first task of the evening, clearing a cupboard, taking out a nailed in shelving unit and sliding a new fridge in there.

While waiting for Andy to get the necessary tools, the gang gathered round to hear our second task, inspired by the excellent show, Taskmaster. The task was in two groups to create a scary short film using contents from the cupboard. Each group had 10minutes to plan their film and they got bonus points for featuring Andy in said film.

> "Your time starts now"

Just as this is announced, Andy walks in with a saw held out in a murderous rage as he turns towards the cupboard to meet his foe, the shelving unit. Pieter valiantly blocked his path to the cupboard screaming to take him instead; both teams thought they had their short films in the bag at this point. Disappointingly, he merely hacks at Pieter's finger; a warning saw. Then he proceeds to tear the unit limb from limb, dragging it unceremoniously from its dusty home to be used as a prop in a later film. It was brutal and I was getting increasingly concerned we hadn't foreseen the health and safety risk in this task.

After the fridge was in situ, and after a therapy session both teams felt ready to take on task two; the short film.

Film one featured a rendition of Psycho with a shower curtain and shower head from the cupboard, complete with the Psycho sound effect. Poor Sarah didn't see Julian or his knife coming until it was too late. Andy starred as a voice of Sarah's partner at the beginning "I'll be in in a minute darlin'". Hmmm...you could say he orchestrated the whole thing in fact. One to mull on.

Film two featured a stable marriage of two equal psychopaths. Pieter took up Andy's saw and (in a chilling display of chauvinism) came home expecting a change from his usual dinner from his wife, Marta. Marta described the meal as being "very fresh and jumping around in the market not that long ago". Butler Andy was called to reveal the meal which was Kit, definitely supposed to be dead with a knife protruding from her, but who instead dissolved into laughter trying to get her sound effect to work. At least Tom was genuinely surprised to see her - we've paid for an additional therapy session for him.

Some behind the scenes quotes from the making of the films:

Maybe can we get some more blood

If you wanna be dead body number one?

*It's a shame this paper cutter has a safety on it *

Hopefully no one needs the loo

I'm a bit scared of Andy

Well done to both teams, sporting efforts all round. Team two narrowly won the contest but all were awarded sweets, including Andy.

If you're concerned about Pieter's wellbeing, I can report that after spending the night in A&E and what he called a 'blood transfusion' he's looking much more like himself. Although he did have an awful lot of tomato ketchup around his mouth. I think it was ketchup....I'm sure it was.

Remember the Fireworks at Glyndon tomorrow!

Lots going on this weekend and next week we're at Clothes for Causes for our run starting at the Naval College. Until next time!



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